Dragon Journal (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dragonjournal) wrote2019-06-27 04:49 pm
dragonjournal) wrote2019-06-27 04:49 pm
The Problem With Needing to Do Everything
This is a problem that is very, very real for every single mom out there, whether they are married or not.
See; women, especially, try to do everything for everyone. And then, we get burnt out and run down, and that is why we don't do well, sometimes.
I've noticed this about myself. I need to do everything for my kids. Camp? Yes. Day camp? Absolutely. A night out with friends? You betcha. My son has all these things. Camp, day camp, and nights out. And while that's good for him - he needs to get out of the house - it's not so good for me.
See, my normal schedule on a normal morning is this:
540am: wake up
6am: Leave for gym
645am: gym
8am: leave gym for work
845am: get into work
930am-6pm: Work
7pm: Home
9pm: Bed
Now, once I reach home, there's: dinner, dishes, laundry, bathrooms, cat's pan, living room, bedrooms all to clean by myself. Don't get me wrong, AJ helps, but he can't do that without some pretty close supervision.
Why do I get to work 45 minutes early? Because I need to set up my system - which takes most of 30 minutes - and to write.
Because I like writing. I'm a writer. I went to school to be a better one. and I like doing it. But at home, all the other stuff gets in the way, so I write for 45 minutes before work. And on breaks, and during down time, or when I'm on hold.
That's when I'm writing this, actually.
But, how do we balance everything out? How do we, as humans, figure out how to do all the stuff we need to do, and some of the stuff we want to do? I mean, I read while on the bike at the gym. I write when there's a moment at work. So, that covers doing those things. But like, playing video games? Cross stitching? Those need to be done at home. I can't do those other places. But home is where all the work waits for me.
Now, what my son and I have done, to even things out, is to do all the cleaning on Saturday, get it done in a couple of hours, and then spend the rest of the weekend hanging out and doing other things. Like, next weekend, we're going to see Far From Home, because OMG SPIDERMAN. But first, we have to clean the house.
But how do you balance it out? How do you do everything? Like, I haven't cleaned the house in three weeks because of one thing or another. (Last weekend was Pride, so much fun was had! and the weekend before I just couldn't motivate myself, and the weekend before that I had to work.) So like, my house is a wreck. I've done some laundry here and there, and some dishes. But, seriously? Not enough to "keep up". I need to vacuum, I need to scrub down the kitchen, I need to sweep and mop everything.
I need to know how to do this. Someone help? I just don't know how to motivate myself to do everything.
See; women, especially, try to do everything for everyone. And then, we get burnt out and run down, and that is why we don't do well, sometimes.
I've noticed this about myself. I need to do everything for my kids. Camp? Yes. Day camp? Absolutely. A night out with friends? You betcha. My son has all these things. Camp, day camp, and nights out. And while that's good for him - he needs to get out of the house - it's not so good for me.
See, my normal schedule on a normal morning is this:
540am: wake up
6am: Leave for gym
645am: gym
8am: leave gym for work
845am: get into work
930am-6pm: Work
7pm: Home
9pm: Bed
Now, once I reach home, there's: dinner, dishes, laundry, bathrooms, cat's pan, living room, bedrooms all to clean by myself. Don't get me wrong, AJ helps, but he can't do that without some pretty close supervision.
Why do I get to work 45 minutes early? Because I need to set up my system - which takes most of 30 minutes - and to write.
Because I like writing. I'm a writer. I went to school to be a better one. and I like doing it. But at home, all the other stuff gets in the way, so I write for 45 minutes before work. And on breaks, and during down time, or when I'm on hold.
That's when I'm writing this, actually.
But, how do we balance everything out? How do we, as humans, figure out how to do all the stuff we need to do, and some of the stuff we want to do? I mean, I read while on the bike at the gym. I write when there's a moment at work. So, that covers doing those things. But like, playing video games? Cross stitching? Those need to be done at home. I can't do those other places. But home is where all the work waits for me.
Now, what my son and I have done, to even things out, is to do all the cleaning on Saturday, get it done in a couple of hours, and then spend the rest of the weekend hanging out and doing other things. Like, next weekend, we're going to see Far From Home, because OMG SPIDERMAN. But first, we have to clean the house.
But how do you balance it out? How do you do everything? Like, I haven't cleaned the house in three weeks because of one thing or another. (Last weekend was Pride, so much fun was had! and the weekend before I just couldn't motivate myself, and the weekend before that I had to work.) So like, my house is a wreck. I've done some laundry here and there, and some dishes. But, seriously? Not enough to "keep up". I need to vacuum, I need to scrub down the kitchen, I need to sweep and mop everything.
I need to know how to do this. Someone help? I just don't know how to motivate myself to do everything.