Dragon Journal (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dragonjournal) wrote2023-04-22 03:55 pm
dragonjournal) wrote2023-04-22 03:55 pm
BRAIN WEASELS
So, lately, I've been having really bad depressive episodes, and fighting against the fact that everyone hates me, no one loves me, guess I'll go eat worms.
I know what brought it on, but I'm very, very tired, and very, very cranky. And I can only fight so much before I'm even more tired, and just want to give in to the brain weasels. See, I just want something to go right. I want something to be good in my life.
Don't get me wrong: I'm mostly healthy for the moment, the cats are healthy, things are starting to even out, and I'm getting more and more interviews. But, things just feel... constipated. I want to work in an office again, around people. And I think interviews go well, and then I don't get an offer. And it bothers me. Like, why am I not good enough? Why am I not the one being called back?
Sigh. It's really hard to go on several interviews and get told no for all of them.
And I'm fearful that the one I will get called for, I won't be able to take, because of where it is.
First world problems, man.
I know what brought it on, but I'm very, very tired, and very, very cranky. And I can only fight so much before I'm even more tired, and just want to give in to the brain weasels. See, I just want something to go right. I want something to be good in my life.
Don't get me wrong: I'm mostly healthy for the moment, the cats are healthy, things are starting to even out, and I'm getting more and more interviews. But, things just feel... constipated. I want to work in an office again, around people. And I think interviews go well, and then I don't get an offer. And it bothers me. Like, why am I not good enough? Why am I not the one being called back?
Sigh. It's really hard to go on several interviews and get told no for all of them.
And I'm fearful that the one I will get called for, I won't be able to take, because of where it is.
First world problems, man.